For the first time in a long time I skimmed through the Reader on Wordpress. I rarely look at Freshly Squeezed. For me the blogs that touch my heart most are the ones that will probably never get a comment, never get a 'like'. Wordpress seems to be so full of the lonely, the sad and sometimes desperate. If you see this post and you have some time, take a look at some of the relationship posts. There are people struggling, finding it hard to see a way out and maybe your words might help. I know this isn't strictly a social network but sometimes reaching out to friends and family isn't enough. Sometimes the words or advice of strangers may be the help they need. 💋
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Self Help
Silver Linings Playbook
I am reading the book right now, but I saw the movie on Saturday.
I don't like rom coms, and whilst I like Bradley Cooper, I was not a die hard fan like the rows of giggling girls who packed the afternoon showing. I only stayed because I had just seen Argo, and this was on after.
I was also not keen on seeing how Hollywood was going to portray a story about love and mental health on the big screen.
I have to say I was pleasantly surprised. The acting was first rate from the cast and issues were handled really well whilst still managing to stay light-hearted.
I will definitely see this again before it leaves the cinema for DVD. I identified with many parts of this, and it gave me hope for the future. I left the cinema feeling as if I had been given a big hug and told "everything will be okay".

Thursday is Reblog Day
That’s right you crazy kids, from now on Thursday will be ‘Reblog Day’ on my site. I will choose posts from others that really grab me and repost them here.
There are so many great writers on WordPress that don’t even get a look in because they lack followers, or comments and so never may never make it to ‘Freshly Pressed’. So this is for everyone who deserves to get some recognition for their hard work.
If you would like me to repost your work, get in touch, lostlifefound@hotmail.co.uk, follow me on Twitter @lostlifefound or just leave a comment here.
All the best,
Nicky x
Resolution Free Zone For 2011
Every year I see people, friends, family, colleagues making lists of the things they hate about themselves that they want to change. It could be losing weight, ditching a guy/girl, planning to climb Kilimanjaro, or even just as simple as exercising every day.
By February the gym numbers fall, the smokers start smoking again, and the people who joined slimming class comfort eat and put on the 7 lbs they lost in the first week. Okay, I exaggerate but you get my point.
In 2011, I am not making a single resolution. I am not going to set myself unrealistic goals. I will not let myself down.
Right now, I feel as though my life is just a series of spontaneous moments with little organisation and routine. I live in each of these moments, and setting resolutions just gives me a reason to dislike myself if they go wrong.
This is a resolution free zone.
Flattered, Disappointed But Grateful
I attended an interview recently. I can’t say who it was with or where it was. I call it an interview, but it wasn’t exactly. I travelled for two hours and only got to sit a 45-minute exam. I was then told “Thank you very much, we will be in touch”. My visitor pass was taken, and then I left the building. In the moments of being ushered into the large conference room, I felt a mixture of being flattered, disappointed and grateful. Hard to explain, but I will try.
- Flattered because I was deemed good enough to be asked to attend.
- Grateful because after so much time out of work I was being given a chance to prove myself. It has given me a much-needed boost this week.
- Disappointed that my chosen field seems to still be so male-dominated.
Seeing a room full of men should have made me feel slightly self-conscious, but actually it had the opposite effect. I answered the questions, and even had to ask for extra paper on one question as I started writing ‘War and Peace’.
My self-esteem has been quite low lately for one reason or another, but I got a huge boost by being able to put on a suit, get my resume ready and to know I had an interview. It was a great feeling and I still feel grateful now because other work is being pitched to me on the back of this interview.
I am in good place right now x
Are ‘Work Friends’ Really Your Friends?
…It’s the question that has been in my mind for a while.
I have been an IT contractor for around 6 years now. In that time I have met MANY people. You do become friendly with people in your team, but it usually only lasts for the life of the project and then you move on.
However the world can seem small when you go from one project to another and actually meet people who you knew from previous companies. Also with the nature of the job I do (when I am working) we work long hours and often at weekends.
At one point I ended up spending so much time with work friends that I would socialise with them outside of work on a regular basis, and so those barriers began to fall and I classed them as real friends.
So I wasn’t really prepared for what happened once the recession hit. People began to call less, email even less frequently. If there were jobs out there, rather than share info, people didn’t get in touch anymore. Then reality sank in… All of the people who I have seen as friends are actually competition as we all go for the same jobs. It saddens me to see how things have changed.
Related Articles
- 5 More Social Job Search Tools That Will Get You Hired (socialtimes.com)
Staying Positive During Tough Times
I have been officially out of work for 3 months. As I work in IT, it isn’t the first time. The longest I was out of work was nearly 6 months last year.
I will admit that it was a scary time, not knowing when there would be work or whether I would be considered for work after being out of a very competitive market for a while. During that time, I looked at my situation as failure and often blamed myself even when it was clear that it was just the current climate.
Probably the hardest thing is not having the freedom to do the things I want as I used to. Just a few years ago, I lived life as I wanted and it suited me as I am very much a free spirit. I was once very happy with my life and never foresaw the quite drastic change of direction that it has taken. It is often hard to explain to friends when I can’t do the activities that I would normally have just jumped at doing without hesitation. I find it frustrating, and I know they must do too, but now I have to think carefully about everything I do and mostly turn invites down because every day I need to work out how I will pay my bills.
As well as job hunting I have tried to keep busy and fill my days with doing jobs around the house, and cheap (often free) activities. What this time out has taught me is a lot more about myself. I try to plan and set myself daily tasks, just as I would have done whilst I was working to keep myself busy and to stay positive. Even writing this blog was a task today
Here are 5 things you can do to keep yourself motivated
1. Try and get out of the house everyday
It is really important if you are not working to feel the sun on your skin or just to get some fresh air! It helps me to think clearly and just feel better in general.
2. Exercise
Another thing I discovered this year is that I love walking. I walk approximately 30km per week now and I love it. I used to have to motivate myself to go to the gym or go for a run. Walking is a pleasure, and it has helped me shed 2 dress sizes since April. Whatever you like to do for exercise, make sure you keep it up. The endorphins will help keep you positive.
3. Stay Focused
Try and plan at least part of your day and then leave yourself time to do what you want. I find that once I start on the things I have planned, the day just disappears anyway! Even if I don’t feel like focusing on big things, I try to tackle little things just so I can feel as if I have achieved something.
4. Start a Group
If you know other people who are in the same situation as you, start a group. Helping each other to find work and give advice and support is invaluable and helps you understand that you are not alone.
5. Volunteer
If you think you have a skill or just some time that you could put to better use, get out there and volunteer. It could be with a local group or organisation or you can even be an online volunteer if you have the right skills. I have volunteered with UN Online Volunteers in the past and always found it a very rewarding experience.
Related Articles
- Volunteer When Job Hunting (turbotax.intuit.com)
- How to Volunteer for the Environment and Go Green Groups (brighthub.com)
- Online volunteers make an impact (cnn.com)
- Freelancing Tips: Will You Work for Free? (queercents.com)
- Volunteering benefits those with functional limitations (tricitypsychology.com)


